Life In The Bubble

My father once got lost in an IKEA, though he’d probably vehemently deny it if you asked him. Round and round he went, somehow skipping the stairs down into the Marketplace and looping instead through the restaurant to end up back where he started. You know what I’m talking about – every IKEA is the same. In fact, the IKEA in East Palo Alto is a disturbingly exact replica of the IKEA in Coquitlam, perhaps to prevent the kind of panic attacks that a sealed biosphere populated by particle board furniture and umlauts wreaks on the average male. You need the equivalent of a video game walkthrough guide to escape IKEA intact and financially solvent.

I had a bubble moment of my own last Friday while attending Shrek 2. In the stolen moments (stolen by the movie execs, not me, you can be sure) between the lights dimming and the start of the main feature, something struck me. I realized that every movie being advertised had been produced within the state of California. Pixar had an ad for its new movie – they’re in Emeryville, about an hour away. Disney and a few other Hollywood studios had their latest offerings on display – a mere five-hour drive away.

And, of course, the main feature itself was a cultural ouroboros, with numerous allusions to popular culture, most of which originated in some form or another in either LA or Hollywood. Weird.

Everywhere you look, there’s a reference to California in one form or another – it’s all-encompassing, but until you’re here you don’t really realize the origin of just about everything is Californian in one sense or another. When we first arrived, people asked how I was adjusting to life in the valley – I responded it hadn’t been much of a transition at all. After all, which magazines do I read? Which websites do I monitor regularly? Which inventors had I grown up admiring? A lot of them were located here in Silicon Valley. Not much of a cultural shock, when you think about it.

However, it’s not all 3D-animated ogres and pre-pubescent Internet multi-millionaires. While the importance and creativity of California can not be questioned (especially given it’s the eighth largest economy in the world), there are downsides to being in the Center Of The Universe. For one thing, the TV news is decidedly inward focused – I’d be hard-pressed to remember seeing an international story (beyond Iraq, which doesn’t count) since I arrived. I can’t blame California – when you’re the center of the universe, why do you care about what’s going in the outside world?

Well, I care. And that’s something I need to keep reminding myself about so I don’t get star-struck and forget about the rest of the world.

Phear And Something

The strangeness for our trip to Las Vegas started in SFO before we were even in the air. And all without a Hunter S. Thompson lookalike in sight.

While waiting for the flight, Ashley and I sat next what can only be described as The Busiest Salesman In The Universe. He had several cell phones. He was using two of them simultaneously. In different languages. Ashley counted Spanish, Hebrew, English, and something vaguely Arabic in the mix. And his phone calls came in rapid succession – “What? No….tell him no! It’s 100 or nothing.” followed by a switch in cell phones. This rapidfire conversation continued down the loading ramp and into the plane, until the stewardess told him to unceremoniously hang up.

Mr. Sales was soon surpassed on the weirdometer by the plane’s captain, who only seemed capable of speaking in one continuous stream of consciousness. It was like listening to someone read the French instructions for fastening the seatbelt, without either the benefit of a French accent or an inkling of comprehension. The words “fasten your seat belt and make sure your seat and tray table are in an upright and locked position” had obviously lost all meaning for the man. The least he could have done, if he was resigned to be incomprehensible, would have been to spice it up a little – you know, maybe a little tribute to Denis Leary:

“Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome aboard! Your pilot today is Edward. He’s drunk and hooked on crack. The man sitting next to you has a nailclipper and the woman in front of you appears to be trying to light her shoes on fire. Good luck, folks!”

Vegas itself was pretty weird – I still haven’t decided whether I love it or hate it. On the one hand, it’s a very liberal city. Why, the guys on the street handing out “escorts to your door” literature are obviously big supporters of equal rights – they had no qualms attempting to hand pornographic flyers to both Ashley and I in equal measures. Yah for progress! On the other hand, it did have this sweaty, desperate, and slightly inebriated quality to everything – but that was to be expected, I guess.

On Friday, We caught Cirque du Soleil’s “O” at the Bellagio. The show features some pretty fantastic visuals, and the pool/stage was a feat of theatrical technology. My only complaint with the show was the technology overshadowed the performance – I found I spent the first half-hour of the show trying to figure out how the stage worked! What a geek.

The Phish show on Saturday (the main reason we were in Vegas to begin with) was mind-blowing. Phish was obviously having a good time – it was the third night of their three-night appearance and they were tight. Ironically, I crossed the arena to take a photo of some people wearing silver shirts, only to end up taking a photo of some guy we hung out with at the last Phish show – I didn’t recognize him until I downloaded the photos from my camera! I’ll have some photos up soon, including a pretty cool shot of the glow stick riot in the middle of “Piper”. Stay tuned for that in the next couple of days.