An Easy Gift

Ashley‘s been going nuts trying to find something for me for Christmas. Part of the problem: I don’t really want anything. That’s not to say that there’s nothing I want in this world, just that most of the things I want are either unrealistic to ask someone to buy for Christmas, or can’t be bought in a store. My mother is the same way in recent years. This year, she gave me a gift request that most people would find pretty odd: take $40, give it to people in need on the street. And give it without judgment.

I set out Friday morning to honour my mother’s request. I dutifully stopped at the Scotiabank, took out two yuppie biscuits ($20 bills) from the ATM and then changed it into four $10 dollar bills. But where to give? Ironically, it was before noon, hence none of the street people who normally frequent Granville and Robson begging for change were around. I set off to find another gift for Ashley to kill some time.

On the bus up from English Bay, a man got on the bus and begged a ride off the bus driver. As he wove his way through the passengers in the bus, he asked each person for some change to help him buy a sandwich. I fingered one of $10 bills in my pocket, drew it out and handed it to the man. He looked a little surprised and thanked me for the money.

“Don’t thank me, thank my mom.” I said.
“Oh, okay. Where is she?” he said, looking past me to the seat behind me.
“Oh, she’s not here. It’s a Christmas thing.”

I walked off the bus at my stop, noticing a few strange looks from the other passengers on the bus.

It was afternoon by this point and a few more street people were visible panhandling in the Robson area. I had three people in mind to whom I wanted to distribute the remaining $30: Harmonica Guy, the Space Cellist, and Cat Girl.

Harmonica Guy is an old man who plays harmonica on the street, pausing every couple of bars to look up and say “hi” to people as they pass. Usually he hangs out on Granville near Pender. But he wasn’t there.

Next, I tried to find the Space Cellist. I knew finding him would be hit or miss; either he’d be at his spot at Granville and Robson or he wouldn’t. The Space Cellist has been a mainstay in Vancouver since I visited the city as a kid. Basically, the Space Cellist plays a stringed instrument consisting of two hubcaps sandwiching an acoustic guitar body, acting as a bridge for a set of strings hooked up to an electric amplifier through a weird guitar peddle. He tunes the strings by sliding bolts up and down the strings to get the space cello “in tune”, though however he defines that is anyone’s guess. He bows the strings and the result is something that belongs as a background for the next Pink Floyd album. But again, he wasn’t there.

I was losing hope of finding someone I recognized at this point and Cat Girl was my last chance. Cat Girl sits wrapped in a blanket with her cat on a corner of Robson opposite a store that sells only fridge magnets. Logic suggests the store should have closed a month before it even opened. By some cruel trick of the cosmos, it’s on that corner after three years. Just like Cat Girl. Except, of course, today.

In the end, I distributed the money to two random people on the street and a Salvation Army bell ringer in front of London Drugs.

In retrospect, despite the running around I did, it was still the easiest and cheapest gift to give. Maybe more people should ask for this for Christmas.

An Eventful Evening

It’s been a stressful couple of weeks, what with all the exams I’ve been writing lately, so I haven’t had much time to blog. That aside, I didn’t have many spare brain cells left to write with or any interesting events to report. And just when I thought I had nothing to write, I get assaulted on the way to the movies.

Ashley and I were going to see a movie up on Granville Street and were just crossing the intersection of Nelson and Richards when we saw a man strike a woman. At first, I thought it was a guy being a jerk to his girlfriend, but then he rushed at Ashley and me, striking me in the side of the head. No big damage, but it was a bit of a shock. He was yelling and obviously just looking for a fight. Ashley and I put a bit of distance between ourselves and him and went to help the woman.

At this point, I started thinking straight and asked Ashley to dial 911 on her cell phone. Of course, the one time we actually need a cell phone, she doesn’t have it. I watched as across the street the man proceeded to kick at a taxi and get into another scuffle with another man. I signaled to a woman in a car to dial 911 on her phone. She was in some kind of stupor and took forever to pull out her phone and start dialing. By that time, the man that had been involved in the scuffle had dialed 911. I approached him and used his phone to talk to the police.

We followed the man down into Yaletown, keeping our distance while giving the police directions and a description of the man. The police caught up with us near the Opus hotel and arrested the man (much to the chagrin of a classmate I ran into just as the police showed up).

As it turns out, the man had a mental condition of some kind.

What should have been an episode that would only make me further cynical about the human condition turned into quite the opposite when I met up with Ashley at a local Starbucks. As it turned out, the Starbucks manager had given her a free latte while she waited for me, which was a pretty decent thing to do. And it happened again when we went for dinner: we were a little zoned out so Ashley explained to our waitress what had happened. The manager came over and explained he’d had a similar experience in the restaurant a few nights ago. Then he gave us our drinks on the house!

Wow. Maybe people aren’t so bad after all. Only in Vancouver could I get assaulted and end up feeling better about humankind. How’s that for something to write about?